Addicted Me

2012-02-07T12:56:00.003+08:00

I miss you
Miss you so bad
I don't forget you
Oh it's so sad

I hope you can hear me
I remember it clearly

The day you slipped away
Was the day i found
It won't be the same

I didn't get around to kiss you
Goodbye on the hand
I wish that I could see you again
I know that I can't ooooooooooooh
I hope you can hear me
Cause I remember it clearly

I've had my wake up
Won't you wake up
I keep asking why
And I can't take it
It wasn't fake it
It happened you passed by

Now you're gone
Now you're gone
There you go
There you go
Somewhere I can't bring you back
Now you're gone
Now you're gone
There you go
There you go
Somewhere you're not coming back

I miss you

Nathan Hartono - 'There Is Much More To This'

2011-12-18T11:53:00.000+08:00

Take a Chance

2011-10-12T15:34:00.000+08:00

Verse 1 (Aston) :
Your so scared to fall in love,
coz you end up in the dust,
everytime, everytime.
now you see us all the same,
like our words are just a game,
spitting lies, dirty lies.
Verse 2 (Oritse):
I know you know there's something here,
but you cannot get past the fear,
i can help you make it clear.
Chorus (Aston):
So when you feel,
like trying again,
reach out take my hand,
see how great it could be,
to fall in love,
with someone you can trust,
who would never give up,
coz your all that he needs,
baby take a chance on me,
baby take a chance on, oh woah,
baby take a chance on me,
baby take a chance on, oh woah woah.
Verse 3 (Aston):
You give 100%,
but you've never seen a cent,
they're so blind,
they're so blind,
coz im looking at your face,
and the worlds a better place,
in your eyes, lovely eyes.
Verse 4 (Oritse) :
I know you know there's something here,
but you cannot get past the fear,
i can help you make it clear.
Chorus (Aston) :
So when you feel,
like trying again,
reach out take my hand,
see how great it could be,
to fall in love,
with someone you can trust,
who would never give up,
coz your all that he needs,
baby take a chance on me,
baby take a chance on, oh woah,
baby take a chance on me,
baby take a chance on, oh woah woah
Bridge (Marvin) :
You got nothing to lose baby,
but you wont know if you dont try,
please dont leave me asking why,
so when your ready to choose baby,
i'll be here with open arms...
Bridge (Aston):
With the same love in my heart
Chorus (Aston) :
So when you feel,
like trying again,
reach out take my hand,
see how great it could be,
to fall in love,
with someone you can trust,
who would never give up,
coz your all that he needs,
baby take a chance on me,
baby take a chance on, oh woah,
baby take a chance on me,
baby take a chance on, oh woah,
So when you feel like trying again....

I won't let you go

2011-10-11T11:35:00.000+08:00

When it's black,
Take a little time to hold yourself,
Take a little time to feel around,
Before it's gone,
You won't let go,
But you still keep on falling down,
Remember how you saved me now,
From all of my wrongs yeah,
If there's love just feel it,
If there's life we'll see it,
This is no time to be alone, alone, yeah,
I, wont let you go,
Say those words,
Say those words like there's nothing else,
Close your eyes and you might believe,
That there is some way out yeah,
Open up,
Open up your heart to me now,
Let it all come pouring out,
Theres nothing I can't take,
If there's love just feel it,
And if there's life we'll see it,
This ain't no time to be alone, alone, yeah
I, wont let you go,
If your sky is falling,
Just take my hand and hold it,
You don't have to be alone, alone, yeah,
I, won't let you go,
And if you feel the fading of the light,
And you're too weak to carry on the fight,
And all your friends that you count on have disappeared,
I'll be here, not gone, forever, holding on, Oh,
If there's love just feel it,
And if there's life we'll see it,
This ain't no time to be alone, alone, yeah,
I, wont let you go,
If your sky is falling,
Just take my hand and hold it,
You don't have to be alone, alone, yeah,
I won't let you go,
I wont let you go, I wont let, x 2,
I won't let you go x 2,

Slipping Away..

2011-10-06T14:39:00.002+08:00

'Cause it only breaks my heart, to see you goin through this to see you goin through this and there's nothing that I can do and it only breaks my heart, you don't have to do this I've got nothing to hold on to

'Cause you keep slipping away, a little bit more everyday now feels like I'm running in place you keep slipping away away just when I get you alone it feels like I'm on my own like the tears running down on your face you keep slipping away away, you keep slipping away

And it only makes me sad I think we almost made it, girl we almost made it you know as well as I and I take you in my arms, pull you close to me but every time I try you keep slipping away a little bit more every day now feels like I'm running in place you keep slipping away away just when I get you alone it feels like I'm on my own like the tears running down on your face you keep slipping away away you keep slipping away

Should I give up? should I let go? my mind says yes but my heart says no, my heart says no, my heart says no

'Cause you keep slipping away, a little bit more every day now feels like I'm running in place you keep slipping away away cause you keep slipping away (oooh you you)

'Cause you keep slipping away, a little bit more every day now feels like I'm running in place you keep slipping away away just when I get you alone, feels like I'm on my own like the tears running down on your face you keep slipping away away you keep slipping away (you keep slipping away)

2011-09-19T22:50:00.001+08:00

Never knew I could feel like this
Like I've never seen the sky before
Want to vanish inside your kiss
Every day I love you more and more

Listen to my heart, can you hear it sing?
Telling me to give you everything
Seasons may change, winter to spring
But I love you until the end of time

Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place
Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace
Suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste
It all revolves around you

And there's no mountain too high, no river too wide
Sing out this song and I'll be there by your side
Storm clouds may gather and stars may collide
But I love you, I love you
Until the end of time
(Until the end of time)

Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day
Oh, come what may, come what may
I will love you, I will love you

Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place

Come what may, come what may
I will love you until my dying day

Life

2011-09-10T12:08:00.001+08:00

“It’s laughing with your friend at a time when you shouldn’t. It’s the sweat in your palms wanting to know someone you see and the pit in your stomach when they actually see you. It’s being touched by hands that aren’t your own. It’s the thrill of an escape that almost wasn’t. it’s the embarrassment you feel, naked for the first time. It’s helping a friend find something they lost. It’s a smile, a joke, a song. It’s what someone does that they like doing. It’s what someone does that they like remembering. It’s the thinking of things you m ay never do and the doing of things you may never have though. It’s the road ahead and the road behind. It’s the first step and the last and every one in between, because they all make up the good life.”

Having a coke with you

2011-09-04T14:23:00.001+08:00

Having A Coke With You

is even more fun than going top San Sebastain, Irun, Hendaye, Biarritz, Bayonne
or being sick to my stomach on the Travesera de Gracia in Barcelona
partly because in your orange shirt you look like a better happier St. Sebastian
partly because of my love for you, partly because of your love for yoghurt
partly because of the fluoresent orange tulips around the birches
partly because of the secrecy our smiles take on before people and statuary
it is hard to believe when I'm with you that there can be anything as still
as solemn as unpleasently definitive as statuary when right in front of it
in the warm New York 4 o'clock light we are drifting back and forth
between each other like a tree breathing through its spectacles

and the portrait show seems to have no faces in it at all, just paint
you suddenly wonder why in the world anyone ever did them I look
at you and I would rather look at you than all the portraits in the world
except possibly for the "Polish Rider" occasionally and anyway it's in the Frick
which thank heavens you haven't gone to yet so we can go together the first time
and the fact that you move so beautifully more or less takes care of Futurism
just as at home I never think of the "Nude Descending a Staircase" or
at a rehearsal a single drawing of Leonardo or Michaelangleo that used to wow me
and what good does all the research of the impressionists do them
when they never got the right person to stand near the tree when the sun sank
or for that matter Marino Marini when he didn't pick the rider as carefully
as the horse

it seems they were all cheated of some marvelous experience
which is not going to go wasted on me which is why I am telling you about it

Frank O'Hara

Plain White T's - Rhythm Of Love

2011-06-28T13:52:00.000+08:00

Plain White T's - Rhythm Of Love

My head is stuck in the clouds
She begs me to come down
Says "Boy quit foolin' around"
I told her "I love the view from up here
Warm sun and wind in my ear
We'll watch the world from above
As it turns to the rhythm of love"
We may only have tonight
But till the morning sun you're mine all mine
Play the Music low and sway to the rhythm of love

My heart beats like a drum
A guitar string to the strum
A beautiful song to be sung
She's got blue eyes deep like the sea
That roll back when she's laughing at me
She rises up like the tide
The moment her lips meet mine
We may only have tonight
But till the morning sun you're mine all mine
Plain White T's Rhythm Of Love lyrics found on http://www.directlyrics.com/plain-white-ts-rhythm-of-love-lyrics.html

Play the Music low and sway to the rhythm of love

When the moon is low
We can dance in slow motion
And all your tears will subside
All your tears will dry

Ba-ba ba-ba ba-ba baba
Da da-da dum da-da dum
Ba-ba ba-ba ba-ba ba-ba
Da da-da dum da-da dum

And long after I've gone
You'll still be humming along
And I will keep you in my mind
The way you make love so fine
We may only have tonight
But till the morning sun you're mine all mine
Play the music low and sway to the rhythm of love

happy thoughts

2011-06-27T10:54:00.001+08:00

Got to talk to her last night through smses.. Feels good as I miss being friends with her.. :D

define relationship...

2011-05-11T23:36:00.000+08:00

Took this from a website(A Women's Health) about 15 defining moments in a relationship.. and i did some minor changes so to suit better.. Here it goes.. :)

1)First Talk

Your first talk till dawn Astronomers say it takes just over eight minutes for light from the sun to reach the earth. And that's about how long it feels you've been talking, though it's been over eight hours. "My God, look at the time!" you both say, cursing the violet sky. But it's a good sign if all you want to do is talk for a few million more trips into space and back.

2)First Kiss

The first kiss We know: Duh. But how could we not mention that Big Red moment? It's like no other feeling in the world.

3)Girlfriend/Boyfriend?

When he/she introduces you as "my girlfriend/boyfriend" It's so utterly high school that the title still straightens your spine. But how can it not? You're now officially pinned, picked, branded, wanted.

4)First Morning

The first morning after Some guys/girls you wouldn't share a beet salad with, let alone a whole night. "You want coffee?" he/she asks the next morning, tossing the duvet/comforter your way as he/she pads to the kitchen. Please, she's/he's saying by the ease of his/her actions, stay.

5)I Love You?

Finding the nerve to say "I love you" Jessica Simpson seems content to do so through national magazines. For the rest of us, though, the moment is fraught with anxiety: What if he/she stares at us blankly? What if we're saying it too soon, and…Sorry, what was that? You do? Oh, thank God.

6)First We

The first time you write "we" in an e-mail to your friends And they don't write back, "We? Who the hell is we?"

7)First Fight

The first time you fight and make up Let's be honest: If you never fight, someone's not speaking up. Consider it like an oil change: a healthy way to clean out gunk so you can get back to the joy ride.

8)First Trip

That first trip together What better way to gauge how you'll fare on your journey through life than to see how you survive hours of snaking security lines? It's also when you establish who'll get the window seat for the duration of your relationship--so act fast, woman.

9)First Grocery Shop

The first time you grocery shop together You know how his/her lips taste after a workout and a cold beer/drink. You know to give him/her five minutes alone when he/she shakes his head in a "work sucked" kind of way. But to watch this man/woman slip a family-size Fruit Loops into the basket with a dopey grin on his/her face--that's when you realize you still have worlds to learn about each other.

10)First Control

The first time he/she lets you control his/her wallet/purse/iPhone/iPod Seriously, you don’t know how hard it is for him/her to hand over something he/she worships so much. Not as much as he/she worships you, of course, but close. Scary close

11)The Future?

The moment you see a future with him/her Some women/men could imagine having a future with the guys/girls in movies/drama serials. But with the man/woman you love, the future you see is sure-footed and sane: A foot rub after a long day. A laundry basket and a loving squeeze (though if he's/she's folding, you really are dreaming).

12)First Notice

When you notice you are no longer primping for him/her Whoops! You're sitting on the couch in your time-of-the-month undies. Yet he's/she's looking at you more lovingly than when you're all gussied up. Clearly, my dear, this is the real deal.

13)First Doctor Visit

Going to the doctor together for the first time Need reason number 652 to stay fit? Have a long sit in a waiting room for someone you love. You'll vow never to have to be there for something worse, because now you need to be healthy for each other.

14)Caring Together

When you care for something together It doesn't really matter if it's a tomato garden or Rufus the drooling French bulldog. But when you're both responsible for taking care of another living thing, your pairing becomes much more important. Be proud as you watch it grow.

15)Your Commitment

When you commit--we're talking long-term commit--to each other On the one hand, it feels a bit like picking partners in the schoolyard. ("You want me on your team? Really? Me too!") On the other, it's a watershed moment, when you find yourself so profoundly lucky that someone you adore so much feels exactly the same way about you.

Just a note..

2011-05-10T17:58:00.002+08:00

love is not just about having your loved ones by your side. it is more about seeing your loved ones being happy and enjoying the love you had given them.

Adele - Turning Tables (With Lyrics)

2011-04-29T16:55:00.000+08:00

Close enough to start a war
All that I have is on the floor
God only knows what we're fighting for
All that I say, you always say more

I can't keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb, I can't breathe

So I won't let you close enough to hurt me
No, I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I cant give you, what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables

Under hardest guise I see ooh
Where love is lost, your ghost is found
I braved a hundred storms to leave you
As hard as you try, no I will never be knocked down

I can't keep up with your turning tables
Under your thumb, I can't breathe

So I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no
I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I cant give you, what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
Turning tables

Next time I'll be braver
I'll be my own savior
When the thunder calls for me
Next time I'll be braver
I'll be my own savior
Standing on my own two feet

I won't let you close enough to hurt me, no
I won't ask you, you to just desert me
I cant give you, what you think you gave me
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables
To turning tables
Turning tables, yeah
Turning ohh

Strangers, again

2011-04-22T21:15:00.001+08:00

stage 7... how i wish i could go back to stage 4 and do the right thing..
sometimes one party might have closed the chapter and moved on but the other party might not have..

knowing that she has moved on and now with her current bf.. it hurts badly.. till now i know i still love her.. evidently i have moved on and closed the chapter after going through alot of pain and unhappiness.. deleting her from FB (which i totally regret till now)and taking up new stuff including my latest ex korean gf.. but i have moved on..

my only regret is that i have found courage to add her on fb again.. but i know that she had not response to it or maybe she has rejected it.. but i do wish that we can be friends again..
if you are reading this.. i just want to be friends..

sigh...

2011-04-02T17:46:00.001+08:00

It's sad to know that you r a dirty little secret of ur ex.. Buried deep away from her.. Sigh.. Why is she affecting me so.. :(

tired...

2011-04-01T23:50:00.002+08:00

have you ever reach a point that after trying so hard to make things work is so tiring
especially when the other party is not helping
time and time again that she hurts u so bad
be it small things or even ridiculous things
you still forgive and try even harder

but once you reach the pinnacle
it's like everything stops
u sit down and you look back at the things you have done

That should be me

2011-03-31T13:50:00.000+08:00

Everybody's laughing in my mind
Rumors spreading 'bout this other guy

Do you do what you did, what you did with me?
Does he love you the way I can?
Did you forget all the plans that you made with me?
'Cause baby, I didn't

That should be me holding your hand
That should be me making you laugh
That should be me, this is so sad
That should be me, that should be me

That should be me feeling your kiss
That should be me buying you gifts
This is so wrong, I can't go on
'Til you believe that that should be me
That should be me

You said you needed a little time for my mistakes
It's funny how you use that time to have me replaced
Did you think that I wouldn't see you out at the movies?
Whatcha doing to me?

You're taken' him where we used to go
Now if you're trying to break my heart
It's working 'cause you know

That, that should be me holding your hand
That should be me making you laugh
That should be me, this is so sad
That should be me, that should be me
That should be me feeling your kiss
That should be me buying you gifts
This is so wrong, I can't go on
'Til you believe that should be me

I need to know should I fight for our love or disown?
It's getting harder to shield this pain in my heart, ooh

That should be me holding your hand
That should be me making you laugh
That should be me, this is so sad
That should be me, that should be me

That should be me feeling your kiss
That should be me buying you gifts
This is so wrong, I can't go on
'Til you believe that that should be me, ooh

Holding your hand, that should be me
The one making you laugh, oh baby
Oh, that should be me, yeah

That should be me, giving you flowers
That should be me, talking for hours
That should be me, that should be me
That should be me

Never should've let you go
I never should've let you go
That should be me
Never should've let you go
That should be me

Never should've let you go
Never should've let you go
That should be me

reply..

2011-03-31T10:48:00.002+08:00

in reply to her post on her blog..

same difference..

Kris Allen - The Truth [FULL]

2011-03-21T15:11:00.000+08:00

Lyin' next to you
Wishing I could disappear...aay
Let you fall asleep
And vanish out into thin air..aay

It's the elephant in the room
And we pretend that we don't see it.
It's the avalanche that looms above our heads.
And we don't believe it.

Tryin' to be perfect
Tryin' not to let you down...ooww
Honesty is honestly the hardest thing for me right now...yeah
while the floors underneath our feet are crumbling
The walls we built together tumblin'
I still stand here holdin' up the roof
Cause it's easier than telling the truth.

I still keep your photographs
I remember how we used to laugh
I can keep on losin' sleep
If you're okay with being torn in half.

It's the elephant in the room
And we pretend that we don't see it.
It's an avalanche that looms above our heads
But we don't believe it.

Tryin' to be perfect, tryin' not to let you down...oww
Honesty is honestly the hardest thing for me right now...yeah
While the floors underneath our feet are crumblin'
The walls we built together tumblin'
I still stand here holdin' up the roof
Cause it's easier than telling the truth.

Stop ignoring that our hearts are mourning
http://www.elyricsworld.com/the_truth_lyrics_kris_allen.html
And let the rain come in.
Stop pretending that it's not ending
And let the end begin.

Oh yeah...

Tryin' to be perfect, tryin' not to let you down...yeah
Honesty is honestly the hardest thing for me right now...yeah
While the floors underneath our feet are crumblin'
The walls we built together tumblin'
I still stand here holdin' up the roof
Cause it's easier than telling the truth.

It's easier than telling the truth...

Memories....

2011-03-18T15:32:00.000+08:00

Going through the whatsapp history with you have brought back lots of memories.. Good ones especially.. Hell yeah, I've IMPRINTED on you! :P

hmmmmmm.. venus and mars

2011-03-18T15:30:00.002+08:00

Venus in Water, Mars in Water (Romantic Water, Watery Desires): You are most receptive to emotional expressions of affection. Although somewhat self-protective and cautious about making new social connections, once you are in committed relationships, you go out of your way to nurture and care for your loved ones. Verbal expressions of affection are less important to you than exchanges of feelings. You feel the need to "become one" with your lover. You come alive in a warm, nurturing, and mutually respectful relationship. Deep down, you fear getting hurt, and rejection is something you try very much to avoid, as it can run deep. Some lovers may find you difficult to understand, especially because of your sensitive nature and tendency to brood or to become silent when unhappy. You find it more difficult than most to share your partner, requiring loyalty from them, although you are also a very understanding person and generally quite forgiving. You are especially adept at feeling out your partner's deeper needs and desires. By picking up your partner's emotional undercurrents, you express your love. Some partners may consider you to be indirect and even roundabout. This may be so because you expect your lover to intuit your needs rather than directly asking for what you want. You have a lot to give, and your feelings run extremely deep. Sexually, you absorb the moods and feelings of your partner. You are giving, and you are extremely beguiling. Intimacy is very important to you, but you can smother others if you are feeling insecure. Not always communicative in bed, you value a partner who seems to know how to please you intuitively. You tend to respect tradition, and your sexual nature may be a tad conservative, but extremely passionate as well. You are not a person who comes on strong or who is aggressive with a partner. You need to feel safe and your partner must demonstrate loyalty and commitment to you in order for you to be at your best and most secure.

Venus and Mars in the same signs: You are vibrant, sexual, and charismatic. For the most part, your needs in love and sex are straightforward, making it easier for you than most to feel satisfied and to know what you want in a partnership.

Sent from my iPhone

[MV/HQ] A-Lin - 給我一個理由忘記 Gei Wo Yi Ge Li You Wang Ji

2011-02-27T21:48:00.000+08:00

Darcy Padilla | The Julie Project

2011-01-26T14:07:00.001+08:00

Click Here

read this and see the photos, tears welled up in my eyes at work when i read this, major heartache.. so heart wrenching..

Bound To You

2011-01-23T21:00:00.000+08:00

Sweet love, sweet love
Trapped in your love
I've opened up, unsure I can trust
My heart and I were buried in dust
Free me, free us

You’re all I need when I’m holding you tight
If you walk away I will suffer tonight

I found a man I can trust
And boy, I believe in us
I am terrified to love for the first time
Can you see that I’m bound in chains
I finally found my way
I am bound to you
I am bound to you

So much, so young
I’ve faced on my own
Walls I built up became my home
I’m strong and I’m sure there’s a fire in us
Sweet love, so pure

I catch my breath with just one beating heart
And I brace myself, please don’t tear this apart

I found a man I can trust
And boy, I believe in us
I am terrified to love for the first time
Can’t you see that I’m bound in chains
I finally found my way
I am bound to you
I am bound to

Suddenly the moment’s here
I embrace my fears
All that I have been carrying all these years
Do I risk it all
Come this far just to fall, fall

Oh, I can trust
And boy, I believe in us
I am terrified to love for the first time
Can you see that I’m bound in chains
And finally found my way
I am bound to you

I am,
Ooh, I am
I’m bound to you

A Birthday Greeting...

2011-01-23T15:19:00.002+08:00

Happy 20th birthday to you! Even if we are not talking anymore, you are still impt to me.. :)

Nelly - Just a dream..

2011-01-22T15:52:00.000+08:00

2011-01-17T14:16:00.001+08:00

And so it is
Just like you said it would be
Life goes easy on me
Most of the time
And so it is
The shorter story
No love, no glory
No hero in her sky

I can't take my eyes off of you

SICK!!

2010-12-21T21:21:00.001+08:00

Why am i always sick near christmas! GO AWAY!! pissy mood! BAH!

One week!

2010-12-13T04:35:00.001+08:00

Exams on Tues and Thurs.. went for zoukout, then cousin's ROM this afternoon, then karaoke not long ago..

It time to cramp whatever i can into my brain! after this week i'll be busy preparing for the christmas party! oh man BUSY BUSY BUSY!! -.-"

What a week.

2010-12-08T21:05:00.000+08:00

What a week, work is like never ending with emails going up but never down!! Work till this Friday and I'm ON LEAVE!! YES!! for a week due to exams and also to clear my own stuff..

ZOUKOUT this sat! I do not know if I'll be able to survive for my exams on Tuesday!
and ROM for my cousin and his wife to be! happy for them lah! :D

ASSIGNMENTS DUE NOW!!!

2010-12-02T23:18:00.001+08:00

Rushing to do my assignments by today.. but now at 11:16pm i'm still stuck!! it's gonna be a long long night.. wish me luck! ^.^

Tyler Ward - Pages Of Life (Original Song) - Camera Test - New York City

2010-11-16T00:41:00.000+08:00

He sits in the hallway reading the letter she left him last night
Dear friend, I will miss you.
But it's been way too long and I've been too polite

So this is over
Over between what you've asked me to be
I'm finally sober
And nothing can change now I'm ready to breathe

Time to Fly
Mark this one down in the pages of life
Say goodbye
Further and further away from the night

Maybe I'll see you again
Give me a few years my friend

Mother has just slipped away
Father still don't understand
Sister has packed all her things cause father still blames her for crumbling plans

Now this is over
Over between what you've wanted to be
Nothing can change now I'm ready to breathe

Rihanna ft. Eminem - Love The Way You Lie Part II - [NEW LOUD 2010] HD +...

2010-11-15T00:12:00.000+08:00

[Rihanna]
On the first page of our story
The future seemed so bright
Then this thing turned out so evil
I don't know why I'm still surprised
Even angels have their wicked schemes
And you take that to new extremes
But you'll always be my hero
Even though you've lost your mind

[Chorus]
Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that's all right because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that's all right because I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie
Ohhh, I love the way you lie

[Rihanna]
Now there's gravel in our voices
Glass is shattered from the fight
In this tug of war, you'll always win
Even when I'm right
'Cause you feed me fables from your hand
With violent words and empty threats
And it's sick that all these battles
Are what keeps me satisfied

[Chorus]

[Rihanna]
So maybe I'm a masochist
I try to run but I don't wanna ever leave
Til the walls are goin' up
In smoke with all our memories

[Eminem]
This morning, you wake, a sunray hits your face
Smeared makeup as we lay in the wake of destruction
Hush baby, speak softly, tell me I'll be sorry
That you pushed me into the coffee table last night
So I can push you off me
Try and touch me so I can scream at you not to touch me
Run out the room and I'll follow you like a lost puppy
Baby, without you, I'm nothing, I'm so lost, hug me
Then tell me how ugly I am, but that you'll always love me
Then after that, shove me, in the aftermath of the
Destructive path that we're on, two psychopaths but we
Know that no matter how many knives we put in each other's backs
That we'll have each other's backs, 'cause we're that lucky
Together, we move mountains, let's not make mountains out of molehills,
You hit me twice, yeah, but who's countin'?
I may have hit you three times, I'm startin' to lose count
But together, we'll live forever, we found the youth fountain
Our love is crazy, we're nuts, but I refused counsellin'
This house is too huge, if you move out I'll burn all two thousand
Square feet of it to the ground, ain't shit you can do about it
With you I'm in my f-ckin' mind, without you, I'm out it

[Chorus]
Love the way you lie

Sigh

2010-11-08T20:58:00.000+08:00

Need someone to verbal diahreaa to..
When she is always been the one listening to my problems..
But now it's so difficult to even contact her..
Wish that I could turn back time
And make things right..
But it's too late.. *sigh*

Joshua Radin, 'I'd Rather Be With You' - new video

2010-11-04T13:41:00.000+08:00

Sitting here, on this lonely dock
Watch the rain play on the ocean top
All the things I feel I need to say
I can't explain in any other way

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too

Now here's the sun, come to dry the rain
Warm my shoulders and relieve my pain
You're the one thing that I'm missing here
With you beside me I no longer fear

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally

The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too

I could have saved so much time for us
Had I seen the way to get to where I am today
You waited on me for so long
So now, listen to me say:

I need to be bold
Need to jump in the cold water
Need to grow older with a girl like you
Finally see you are naturally
The one to make it so easy
When you show me the truth
Yeah, I'd rather be with you
Say you want the same thing too
Say you feel the way I do

2010-10-07T13:56:00.000+08:00

It's been a while since I last talk to her.. But whenever I'm alone or whenever I get to listen to the songs that reminded me of her.. It used to be questions on why but now it only reminds me of the happy times we have with each other.. Friends told me to find someone else and move on, I tried but not even one or someone that catches my eye like she does when I first saw her.. She's not like all my exes that I had or even mentioned previously in my blog.. She has really captured my heart truly.. I don't think she knows about it but if she ever or remember that I do have a blog.. She will know.. Be it in the bear future or never.. I rememeber that I once told her that I have imprinted on her as Jacob has.. Remember that I said that and make a piak sound.. But seriously I dunno why or pls don't ask me why but I did.. I know it sounds very cheesy but it's really how I felt when I said it to her and till now it still stands.. She has capture my heart, soul and mind.. I thought I have felt that before but to compare to now I can be assured that it is the only time I felt that she has.. The feeling is so strong that it cam overtake my senses so completely.. Sigh..

When I found out she has found someone that she's so willing to commit into the relationship.. Everything came crashing down, that moment I feel like trashing everything in sight.. But one sentence she ha said stops everything.. She says that she's very happy!! The moment she said that my heart melts cos to me the most impt is that she must be happy.. Though it's so heart wrenching.. I remain happy and wish her the best.. It's really how I feel but I can never let her know that I still love her.. I stop contacting her even I wanted so much to talk to her.. Keep myself occupied with so many things.. Studies, clubbing, drinking, knowing more ppl, even taking up qigong.. I know it's crazy but I need to keep myself from contacting her..

Friends says that she can just moved on so fast cos she don't even care or have feelings for u at all.. "you're just a experiment for her" and when she said that she just wants to maintain on an occasional text or whatsapps and does not want to meet me even as a friend.. It's as though I'm a disgrace that she wants to hide from her perfect normal world.. No one in her world knows that I exist at all.. All this to anyone it will be a " fuck you and get out of my life" but to me yes it hurts but I don't care actually all I want is for her to be happy and be successful in her life!! Yeah yeah this is the most stupidest thing someone will do but it seems alright to me.. Seriously imprinting has to do with everything.. Maybe in the near future I might find someone but she will never be her and my heart will never be totally belong to the future someone unless it is her..

周杰伦 - 开不了口

2010-10-05T01:11:00.000+08:00

才离开没多久就开始
担心今天的你过得好不好
整个画面是你
想你想的睡不着
嘴嘟嘟那可爱的模样
还有在你身上香香的味道
我的快乐是你想你想的都会笑
没有你在我有多难熬
(没有你在我有多难熬多烦恼)
没有你烦我有多烦恼
(没有你烦我有多烦恼多难熬)
穿过云层我试着努力向你奔跑
爱才送到你却已在别人怀抱
就是开不了口让她知道
我一定会呵护着你也逗你笑
你对我有多重要
我后悔没让你知道
安静的听你撒娇
看你睡着一直到老
就是开不了口让她知道
就是那么简单几句我办不到
整颗心悬在半空
我只能够远远看着
这些我都做得到
但那个人已经不是我

I know it's wrong but i can't get you out of my mind.. you're residing deep in my heart.. can't get you out of my system.. it's so fucking hard!

When love becomes hate.. what's next? but the truth is i still love you!

From me to you.. I kiss your heart..

The river has run wild with Mads Langer

2010-09-29T09:00:00.000+08:00

Just a thought...

2010-09-27T21:43:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, the best way to stay close to someone you love is by being just a friend. -Lauren Willig

All In

2010-09-17T17:26:00.000+08:00

All night staring at the ceiling
counting for minutes I've been feeling this way
So far away and so alone

But you know it's alright
I came to my senses
Letting go of my defenses
There's no way I'm giving up this time
Yeah, you know I'm right here
I'm not losing you this time

And I'm all in, nothing left to hide
I'm falling harder than a landslide
I spend a week away from you last night
And now I'm calling, calling out your name
Even if I lose the game, I'm all in
I'm all in tonight, yeah I'm all in, I'm all in for life

There's no taking back what we've got
Too strong, we've had each other's back for too long
There's no breaking up this time
And you know it's okay, I came to my senses
Letting go of my defenses
There's no way I'm giving up this time

And I'm all in, nothing left to hide
I'm falling harder than a landslide
I spend a week away from you last night
And now I'm calling, calling out your name
Even if I lose the game, I'm all in
I'm all in tonight, yeah I'm all in, I'm all in for life

I want it, I want it, I want it
I want it, I want it, I want it, yeah
I want it, I want it, I want it, yeah

And I'm all in, calling out your name
Even if I lose the game, I'm all in, I'm all in for life
And I'm all in, nothing left to hide
I'm falling harder than a landslide
I spend a week away from you last night
And now I'm calling, calling out your name
Even if I lose the game, I'm all in
I'm all in tonight, yeah I'm all in, I'm all in for life
Yeah I'm all in, I'm all in for life

2010-09-11T10:21:00.000+08:00

Had a dream about her..
seems so real..
Even by keeping myself occupied with stuff..

I'm still missing her so much..

2010-09-05T13:12:00.000+08:00

It's been 12 days since i last saw her..
Yes i've been missing her so much ever since..
Is it really good for us not to meet each other anymore?
To be just acquaintances only?

Yes i miss the times when we're so close and happy..
As she says.. Expectations is what destroy what we had..
Sitting back and reading the letters and postcards she had written to me..
Can't help but feel sad and reprimanding myself for what has happened..

Since yesterday i made up my mind to let it go..
It is sad that we cannot go back to what we used to be..
But now what i feel now is..
I am happy that i get to share 3 months of her life..

Being there with her, watching movies, trips to JB, our food hunt adventures, great adventures at work..
Sharing her deepest thoughts, feelings and nonsensical stuffs..
She makes me feel whole again during those times..
Someone that i could share my inner most thoughts and feelings..

When you wake up in the morning.. you know that it is going to be a great day..
Cos no matter what shit happens at work it is all gone when you get to hear her voice..
The meetups and lazing at home watching movies playing games..
The walk we had after the gong bao braised frog legs..
and many many more memories..

All these memories will stay forever in my heart, soul and mind..
I sincerely thank you for all these..
Be it if we ever get to meet each other again..
I will never ever forget you..

I kiss your heart..

2010-09-01T19:18:00.001+08:00

sometimes even when you love someone so much..

you got to let her go when she is not happy with you..

as what ppl says when you are willing to let go and that's what you call true love..

But sometimes you can't help to be selfish..

Never Say Goodbye

2010-08-23T00:09:00.000+08:00

As I sit in this smokey room
The night about to end
I pass my time with strangers
But this bottle’s my only friend
Remember when we used to park
On Butler Street out in the dark
Remember when we lost the keys
And you lost more than that in my backseat baby
Remember how we used to talk
About busting out - we’d break their hearts
Together - forever
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
You and me and my old friends
Hoping it would never end
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
Holdin’ on - we got to try
Holdin’ on to never say goodbye
Remember days of skipping school
Racing cars and being cool
With a six pack and the radio
We didn’t need no place to go
Remember at the prom that night
You and me we had a fight
But the band they played our favorite song
And I held you in my arms so strong
We danced so close
We danced so slow
And I swore I’d never let you go
Together - forever
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
You and me and my old friends
Hoping it would never end
Never say goodbye, never say goodbye
Holdin’ on - we got to try
Holdin’ on to never say goodbye
I guess you’d say we used to talk
About busting out
We’d break their hearts
Together - forever

Love the way you lie

2010-07-23T21:54:00.000+08:00

kinda of like this song now.. meaningful lyrics.. if you have the chance watch the video when it comes out, youtube have live videos.

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can't breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High of a love
Drunk from the hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I suffocate
And right before im about to drown
She resuscitates me
She fucking hates me
And I love it
Wait
Where you going
I'm leaving you
No you ain't
Come back
We're running right back
Here we go again
It's so insane
Cause when it's going good
It's going great
I'm Superman
With the wind in his bag
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad
It's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snap
Who's that dude
I don't even know his name
I laid hands on her
I'll never stoop so low again
I guess I don't know my own strength

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe
When you're with them
You meet
And neither one of you
Even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah them chills
Used to get 'em
Now you're getting fucking sick
Of looking at 'em
You swore you've never hit 'em
Never do nothing to hurt 'em
Now you're in each other's face
Spewing venom
And these words
When you spit 'em
You push
Pull each other's hair
Scratch, claw, bit 'em
Throw 'em down
Pin 'em
So lost in the moments
When you're in 'em
It's the rage that took over
It controls you both
So they say it's best
To go your separate ways
Guess that they don't know ya
Cause today
That was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
Sound like broken records
Playin' over
But you promised her
Next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
But you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave
Out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn't mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper's just as bad
As mine is
You're the same as me
But when it comes to love
You're just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn't you
Baby it was me
Maybe our relationship
Isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though
Come inside
Pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity
In my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed
I'll aim my fist
At the dry wall
Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed
And set the house on fire

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

When I see you smile..

2010-07-04T23:44:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I wonder
How I'd ever make it through,
Through this world without having you
I just wouldn't have a clue

'Cause sometimes it seems
Like this world's closing in on me,
And there's no way of breaking free
And then I see you reach for me

Sometimes I wanna give up
I wanna give in,
I wanna quit the fight
And then I see you, baby
And everything's alright,
everything's alright

When I see you smile
I can face the world, oh oh,
you know I can do anything
When I see you smile
I see a ray of light, oh oh,
I see it shining right through the rain
When I see you smile
Oh yeah, baby when I see you smile at me

Baby there's nothing in this world
that could ever do
What a touch of your hand can do
It's like nothing that I ever knew

And when the rain is falling
I don't feel it,
'cause you're here with me now
And one look at you baby
Is all I'll ever need,
you're all I'll ever need

be with you

2010-07-01T01:44:00.000+08:00

Hold on little girl
Show me what he's done to you
Stand up little girl
A broken heart can't be that bad
When it's through, it's through
Fate will twist the both of you
So come on baby come on over
Let me be the one to show you

I'm the one who wants to be with you
Deep inside I hope you feel it too
Waited on a line of greens and blues
Just to be the next to be with you

Build up your confidence
So you can be on top for once
wake up who cares about
Little boys that talk too much
I've seen it all go down
Your game of love was all rained out
So come on baby, come on over
Let me be the one to hold you

Why be alone when we can be together baby
You can make my life worthwhile
And I can make you start to smile

hate this feeling

2010-06-28T18:39:00.002+08:00

Have you ever have this feeling, that you can't put it into words and it has this sucky feeling attached to it!

YES I'M FEELING IT NOW!! %&@$&#$@#$

Have you ever...

2010-06-27T19:53:00.000+08:00

Have you ever loved somebody so much
It makes you cry
Have you ever needed something so bad
You can't sleep at night
Have you ever tried to find the words
But they don't come out right
Have you ever, have you ever

Have you ever been in love
Been in love so bad
You'd do anything to make them understand
Have you ever had someone steal your heart away
You'd give anything to make them feel the same
Have you ever searched for the words
to get you in their heart
But you don't know what to say
And you don't know where to start

Have you ever found the one
You've dreamed of all of your life
You'd do just about anything to
look into their eyes
Have you finally found the one
you've given your heart to
Only to find that one won't
give their heart to you
Have you ever closed your eyes and
Dreamed that they were there
And all you can do is wait for the
day when they will care

What do I got to do to get you in my arms baby
What do I got to say to get to your heart
To make you understand how I need you next to me
Gotta get you in my world
'Cuz baby I can't sleep

我爱你

2010-06-25T02:22:00.002+08:00

">

從你眼睛看著自己最幸福的倒影
握在手心的默契是明天的指引
無論是遠近什麼世紀在天堂擁抱
或荒野流離我愛你我敢去
未知的任何命運我愛你我願意
准你來跋扈地決定世界邊境
偶爾我真的不懂你又有誰真懂自己
往往兩個人多親密是透過傷害來證明
像焦慮不安我就任性怕洩漣A怕
所以你生氣我愛你讓我聽
你的疲憊和恐懼我愛你我想親
你倔強到極限的心我撐起所有愛
圍成風雨的禁地擋狂風豪雨
想讓你喘口氣被割破的信心
需要時間痊癒夢想纏著懷疑
未來看不清就緊緊的擁抱
去傳[遞]能量和勇氣我愛你
我愛你我想去未知的任何命運
我愛你讓我聽你的疲憊和恐懼
我愛你我想親你倔強到極限的心
哪裡都一起去一起仰望星星
一起走出森林一起品嬰^憶
一起誤概爭一起雨過天晴
一起更懂自己一起找到意義
我愛你我不要沒有你
我不能沒有你絕不能沒有你

It's been a while

2010-06-20T20:16:00.002+08:00

yes.. it's been a while since i last blog.. was talking to J on the phone.. the topic went on bout blogging.. that i sat on my comp and start to go through my blog.. hmmmmm what i blog about today..

today's father's day.. it's been 5 years since my dad passed on.. i silently wish him happy father's day in my heart.. how i wish i could turn back the clock.. to the day it happens.. insist that he goes to the hospital.. etc etc.. whenever i talk or think about him, tears will just naturally comes out.. i know la very unglam!! :P

kind of feeling so uneasy/uncomfortable/somethings not right.. did not text or talk to J today.. she's with her parents on a day trip to malaysia.. will be waiting for her call tonight.. :)

had family dinner at my brother's place.. now all of them watching Ip man II. i love the fighting scenes.. :D as i've watch the show before.. i took the time to blog about what happen today..

i know i'm boring and predicatable! but who cares!! it's my blog anyways! *evil grinz*

【KTV】周杰倫-說好的幸福呢

2009-04-21T05:31:00.001+08:00

你答应我吗？一起走下这人生好吗？

Heineken - Walk in Closet Commercial

2009-04-21T05:27:00.001+08:00

A quote

2009-03-10T06:09:00.001+08:00

I have loved to the point of madness,
That which is called madness,
That which to me,
Is the only sensible way to love.

F. S.

2009-01-02T16:12:00.000+08:00

A new year,
A new start!

numbness

2008-11-29T07:32:00.002+08:00

it's been a while since i really sit down and write on my blog.. many things has happen in my life..

too many things in fact sometimes i wonder why am i here.. do i really deserve all this??

1. lies travels faster than the truth
2. not everyone u can put ur trust in
3. trust only urself and no one else
4. train ur heart to be of stone.. so u will not get hurt in anyway no mater how big
the attack is..
5. take everything with a pinch of salt
6. believe in karma.. what comes around goes around..
7. money does most of the talking but money is the root of all evil..
8. money can even destroy the strongest of bonds..
9. now i understand why this phrase has been around since money was invented.. money
makes the world goes round/no money no talk..

can't think anymore, even with telling her the truth she does not believe in me anymore.. nothing i do or say can make her stay.. all becos of one message from my ex.. she does not believe in me anymore.. what can i say.. it hurts but all i can do is to swallow everything.. take all the blame.. take a step back and look at the whole situation.. maybe then i can move forward again.. maybe one day the truth goes to her.. and she noes what i mean..

a thought

2008-11-28T16:28:00.001+08:00

why am i still missing her?

2008-11-15T04:24:00.000+08:00

我的老婆是个黑社会大佬！（对我)

2008-11-11T04:13:00.000+08:00

If she is the first thing you think of when you wake up,
the only thing you think of when you're awake,
and the last thing you think of before you go to bed,
then she is really somebody special.

A thought?

2008-11-08T15:54:00.000+08:00

"Sometimes in love you must accept the fact that what makes the person you cared about happy might on the other hand leave you so lonely."

A Quote..

2008-11-03T20:33:00.001+08:00

The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.

W.M.L.

pieces of me..

2008-11-03T05:40:00.003+08:00

was trying work things out/through with her..
trying to save the relationship..

till i heard a guy's voice in the background and she hanged up the phone..
that's when my heart really breaks into a million million pieces..
it'll be my last time that i teared for her..
it'll be the last time i'll ever care for her..
it'll be the last time i'll ever do anything for her..
it'll be the last time...

sigh sigh sigh...

2008-10-30T14:55:00.001+08:00

i missing the times when we're so close..

2008-10-29T05:01:00.000+08:00

老婆，我还是很爱你的。。
可是为何你不在我身边呢？

A Thought..

2008-10-28T06:22:00.001+08:00

if she does not hold on to me tighter or come over soon.. she's gonna lose me soon..

珍惜身边发脾气的女人

2008-10-24T04:40:00.001+08:00

got this from her blog.. make me realize something.. i dunno but i hope my gut feeling is wrong wrong wrong.. *sigh*

永远不会发脾气的女人就如同一杯白开水--解渴，却无味。
你迟到，她向你发脾气，是因为她紧张你，她怕你出了什么意外。
你抽烟，她向你发脾气，是因为她担心你的身体健康。
你喝酒，她向你发脾气，是因为她担心你酒醉后没有人照顾，感觉到孤单，更怕你在酒吧会出什么事，留下她一个人，她希望跟你长长久久，白头到老。
你身上被发现有别的女人香，她向你发脾气，是因为她在乎你，你是她的所有，她不想跟别人分亨你。
你忘记她的生日，她向你发脾气，是因为她对你有所期待，她并不会要求一个陌生人记住她的生日。
女人是最讲理的动物，她的脾气往往导因于各式各样的理由。
女人也是最不讲理的动物，她的理由经常令人无法理解。
女人可以为了一件小得不能再小的事，发一场大得不能再大的脾气。
因为女人对身边的男人有所要求，有所期望，所以常常会失望；失落。
因此，女人容易对男人发脾气。
身边有个会向你发脾气的女人，其实是一件多么幸福的事！
而身边有一个会让自己发脾气的男人，是对女人最大的折磨，也是莫大的幸福。
珍惜你身边那个爱生气的女人，因为会发脾气的女人最可爱~
假如有一天，她不再为你生气……
那她就已经不在爱你!

给我一首歌的时间

2008-10-21T20:36:00.000+08:00

雨停下的天空
灰的更加老旧
你说你不懂为何在这世界上
我晒干了承诺
灰的更冲动
就算这次做错也只是怕错过
在一起吵
分开了错
是不是说没有做完的梦最错
雨落的好
我能承受
在最后的出口
再爱过了才用

能不能给我一首歌的时间
紧紧的把那拥抱变成永远
在我的回忆里
不用太多失眠
如果你想忘记我也能适应
能不能给我一首歌的时间
把故事听到最后才说再见
你送我的眼泪
让他留在雨天

如果你怀疑的心依然勇气当作鄙夷
被淋湿的天空
灰的更加老旧
你说你不懂为何在这时牵手
我晒干了承诺
灰的会很冲动
就算这次做错也只是怕错过
在一起吵
分开了吵
是不是说没有做完的梦最错
雨落的好
我能承受
在最后的出口
再爱过了才有用
你说我不该不该在这个时候
说了我爱你
要怎么证明我没有说过的力气
请告诉我暂停算不算放弃
我只有阴天的回忆

你说我不该不该在这个时候
说了我爱你
要怎么证明我没有说过的力气
请告诉我暂停算不算放弃
你说我不该不该在这时候才说爱你
要怎么证明我没有说过的力气
我只有阴天的回忆。。

still missing you so much..

2008-10-18T17:53:00.000+08:00

I'm missing you like crazy
I think I'm going mad
I simply can't stop thinking
of the special times we had.

Each moment lasts an hour
Each hour lasts a day
The clock is ticking slowly
Just because you went away.

I need you here beside me
I just want to see your face
To feel your precious heartbeat
And be lost in your embrace.

I gaze out of the window
And look up at the moon
I play the waiting Game
And pray you'll be here soon.

They say hope springs eternal
Well I only hope it's true
For I can't bare the emptiness
That comes from missing you.....

周杰伦 - 黑色幽默

2008-10-18T15:46:00.000+08:00

2008-10-17T16:05:00.000+08:00

i'm missing you so much..

no regrets

2008-10-16T11:27:00.002+08:00

i never once regretted falling in love with her..
it's one of the best moments in my life
though it's not for long being together
i love and appreciate every moment of this relationship..

And I thank god for letting me..
have you in my life..

lastly I thank you..

DAMN IT!!!

2008-10-15T15:17:00.003+08:00

OH MAN!!! i feel so useless.. i can't even do my work properly.. i really hate myself.. going to get fucked by people tonight..

....................

2008-10-15T07:28:00.002+08:00

was out with michelle.. went to a karaoke joint till 6am.. drank water (overdose on alcohol).. wrote her a text saying that i'm willing to back out and not to stop her from doing what she really wants.. i really do love her alot.. and i know i can't be selfish.. if you love someone you got to let her go.. if she really belongs to you she will be your's again one day.. but my heart is still in pain.. it has already stop 'beating' once she said those words to me, tears just drop uncontrollably..

two nights before she said those words to me.. i was already having this bad feeling.. was actually quite down and she felt it.. ask me what's wrong but i never did tell her.. actually i wanted to ask her.. is she for real? is she ready to built a future with me? cause i really do not want to get hurt again.. but what the use anymore.. it has come to an end..

time will heal the wound as people always said.. even though it's healed there's always the scar that reminds you why you got hurt in the first place.. can't sleep, can't eat, no mood.. can't even smile properly.. i'll just get stoned and gazed at no where.. even now when i'm writing this down.. tears are falling and i don't even know what am i writing anymore.. listening to the song 画心 repeatedly..

staring into space right now.. even when i'm so tired.. i just can't sleep, maybe i shall just shower and do my work.. just to forget her and my hurt.. work myself till i'm just a tired soul.. so i could force myself to sleep.. i do not wish to resort to cough syrup to make myself drowsy enough to sleep.. bad habit.. chain smoking like nobody's business.. but for now i shall stay away from alcohol.. really overdose on it and got hell drunk and puke for the first time drinking vodka!! i don't puke on vodka.. but i did maybe cause i drank almost the whole bottle and real fast.. urgh!

i'm missing her so much.. i miss her way of talking, her expressions, her smile, her joyful laughter, her gentle ways of making you feel everything's gonna be alright, even when she's in a bad mood.. i love her and i still do.. please do not tell me time will make me forget her.. cos it'll be for a very long time before i can..

2008-10-14T21:19:00.001+08:00

i feel so cold.. so cold..

A question..

2008-10-14T14:37:00.001+08:00

got drunk yesteday but...

no matter how much i drank..

i can't numb the pain in my heart..

泪

2008-10-13T20:30:00.000+08:00

My heart has stopped beating once more..

let's get drunk tonight!

2008-10-13T20:15:00.000+08:00

爱着你像心跳难触摸
画着你画不出你的骨骼
记着你的脸色是我等你的执着
你是我一首唱不完的歌

画心 - 张靓颖，《画皮》电影原声主

2008-10-12T15:56:00.001+08:00

看不穿是你失落的魂魄
猜不透是你瞳孔的颜色
一阵风一场梦爱如生命般莫测
你的心到底被什么蛊惑

你的轮廓在黑夜之中淹没
看桃花开出怎样的结果
看着你抱着我目光似月色寂寞
就让你在别人怀里快乐

爱着你像心跳难触摸
画着你画不出你的骨骼
记着你的脸色是我等你的执着
你是我一首唱不完的歌

看不穿是你失落的魂魄
猜不透是你瞳孔的颜色
一阵风一场梦爱是生命的莫测
你的心到底被什么蛊惑

你的轮廓在黑夜之中淹没
看桃花开出怎样的结果
看着你抱着我目光比月色寂寞
就让你在别人怀里快乐

爱着你像心跳难触摸
画着你画不出你的骨骼
记着你的脸色是我等你的执着
你是我一首唱不完的歌

你的轮廓在黑夜之中淹没
看桃花开出怎样的结果
看着你抱着我目光比月色寂寞
就让你在别人怀里快乐

爱着你像心跳难触摸
画着你画不出你的骨骼
记着你的脸色是我等你的执着
我的心只愿为你而割舍

why?

2008-10-12T04:12:00.002+08:00

i know that it's been a while since i wrote.. but been busy with my work and 'renovating' my room for her arrival.. :)

as the day creeps nearer.. my heart has been beating way too fast..
i'll never forget what my ex has said to me before she left..
she gives me just 6 mths before i can't take it anymore..

my ex has gotten back with her ex..
that's fast of her.. maybe she was keeping some stuff from me too..
i still feel that i do not know much bout her..
i could say i've got no chance to anymore
cause when i broke up with her, she decided to go back to china..
the funny thing is before i broke up with her she already knows that i'm going to do that..
and the more weird thingy is that even if i twitch my backside *lol* she knows what i'm gonna do/say.. scary but endearing..
we have said that we shall remain as friends and she wish me all the best in my work.. at the same time worried that i'll taken advantage off cos i'm always too nice..

i just hate it when my other half does not tell me the truth..
hate that feeling so much..
i rather be told the truth then to find out by myself and feel even more hurt..

today was at my previous work place, my business partner got drunk, called me to go down and save him.. when i went down i saw him.. he was so drunk that he was shivering so badly that we almost wanted to send him to the hospital.. in the end he got better and i sent him back.. will check on him tomorrow when i wake up..

after that i was at a coffee shop having my dinner before heading back home..
was watching the korean movie called stupid or in Chinese 傻瓜.. as it's in Korean it'll be abit draggy but it's a very touching storyline.. i seldom cry during movies but this has touch my heart and tears came out naturally.. so embarrassing lor..
if you got the chance to watch it.. go for it.. i like it.. another is the show call kungfu dance thingy hahaha in Chinese is 劲舞门 i think so.. like all the dance moves.. i always have a thing for female DJ so she aka Fan BingBing has gotten my heart.. just in that movie k.. she sings not bad too.. lol

that's it.. shall go for a smoke now.. then to talk to my gf.. :)

A quote..

2008-09-16T06:28:00.001+08:00

Everyone says you only fall in love once but that's not true, every time I hear your voice I fall in love all over again.

my heart has started to beat once more..

2008-09-11T08:08:00.001+08:00

i'm so so so so so so happy!!
i love you my baby..
gonna zzzzz now..

2008-09-09T22:04:00.001+08:00

Click here

2008-09-09T14:48:00.000+08:00

You will never know true happiness until you have truly loved, and you will never understand what pain really is until you have lost it.

Heal My Broken Heart

2008-09-08T15:40:00.001+08:00

How long will it last?

How long before that empty feeling fades away?

You try to go about your daily routine,

try not to think about it too much.

But it keeps coming back,
sweeping over you like a wave -
that feeling in the pit of your stomach -
you suck in a big breath of air.
How long am I going to feel this way?

2008-09-08T13:26:00.001+08:00

it seems like my life has come to a halt..

i'm lost..
i'm lonely..
i feel so out of place..
no aim..
no purpose..

what the hell am i doing..
why is she affecting me so much..

WHY?

2008-09-08T03:45:00.002+08:00

have you ever have moments when someone u truly love and care about..
be it good or bad..
when she leaves you..
you are hurt..
tears keeps falling down..

but one day..
whenever you think or misses her..
your heart aches so much still..
but tears don't fall anymore?
or should i say..
it's all 'dried' up?

that's what i'm feeling right now..

2008-09-06T08:08:00.003+08:00

i don't think i can ever forget her..

she has carved her name permanently on my heart..

till the day that if i ever get to meet her..

or if we ever get back together..

then my heart will learn to love again..

2008-09-05T15:41:00.000+08:00

Ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation.

- K.G.

2008-09-04T16:42:00.002+08:00

it's been 3 days..

still missing her..

still loving her so much..

it felt like 300 years has passed

it's as though time has stopped moving..

maybe my heart has stopped beating

ever since the day she say goodbye..

2008-09-03T05:43:00.003+08:00

Every hour, every minute, every second
my mind is filled with thoughts of her
the happy moments, the bad moments
flashing through my mind
the intimate thoughts we shared
the connection we have in such a short time
being able to read each other minds
completing each other sentences
tears keeps falling down
when i'm alone lying on my bed
the kisses we shared
the hugs, the way we looked into each other eyes
everything was so good while it last
if loving you is so wrong
why did we fall for each other in the 1st place?

Money is the root of all evil...

2008-09-03T04:54:00.000+08:00

a day has just passed.. and i'm still missing her so much..

*sigh*

爱上你是一个错

2008-09-02T14:29:00.000+08:00

爱上你是一个错

人生有许多难关要过
自古是情关最让人难受
也许我命中注定情海中颠簸
为你我付出这么的多
却让我痛到有苦不能说
因为我爱你就像那飞蛾扑向火
请你告诉我爱上你是一个错
别让我失魂落魄著了魔
解开我的迷惑收起你的冷漠
你怎忍心这样做
请你告诉我爱上你是一个错
别让我漫漫长夜守寂寞
伤痛已经太多心也早以伤透
我已不想再为谁去等候

人生有许多难关要过
自古是情关最让人难受
也许我命中注定情海中颠簸
为你我付出这么的多
却让我痛到有苦不能说
因为我爱你就像那飞蛾扑向火
请你告诉我爱上你是一个错
别让我失魂落魄著了魔
解开我的迷惑收起你的冷漠
你怎忍心这样做
请你告诉我爱上你是一个错
别让我漫漫长夜守寂寞
伤痛已经太多心也早以伤透
我已不想再为谁去等候
请你告诉我爱上你是一个错
别让我失魂落魄著了魔
解开我的迷惑收起你的冷漠
你怎忍心这样做
请你告诉我爱上你是一个错
别让我漫漫长夜守寂寞
伤痛已经太多心也早以伤透
我已不想再为谁去等候

2008-09-01T18:59:00.000+08:00

现在觉得我已经失去所有的意义了，心好痛，眼泪一滴一滴的流下来，真的好痛.

Another bumpy ride ahead

2008-09-01T15:11:00.002+08:00

sigh.. now with more time for myself.. i'm gonna fully concentrate on working on full force on my agency thingy.. maybe a good start to go for my studies part time? i dunno.. cos the last minute decision makes all my plans back to square one.. which is kinda irritating.. but wad to do.. shit happens sometimes.. maybe this is a sign for me to do back full time on my own company.. there's talks of business for my company.. but i do not want to give myself to much false hope..

i hope that she understands that with this new situation, the main thing that i promise her will have to be hold back.. so in love with her.. can't wait to see her again.. missing her so much.. *sigh*

tonight FULL FORCE CRUISING!!! :P

Imagine me without you..

2008-08-27T05:42:00.003+08:00

这首歌代表我心里的话。。老婆，我会很珍惜你的！

Imagine Me Without You - Jaci Velasquez

As long as stars shine down from heaven
And the rivers run into the sea
'Til the end of time, forever
You're the only love I'll need
In my life, you're all that matters
In my eyes, the only truth I see
When my hopes and dreams have shattered
You're the one that's there for me

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you
I need you

Imagine me without you
I'd be lost and so confused
I wouldn't last a day
I'd be afraid without you there to see me through
Imagine me without you
Lord, you know it's just impossible
Because of you
It's all brand new
My life is now worth while
I can't imagine me without you

When you caught me I was falling
Your love lifted me back on my feet
It was like you heard my calling
And you rushed to set me free

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you
I need you

Imagine me without you
I'd be lost and so confused
I wouldn't last a day
I'd be afraid without you there to see me through
Imagine me without you
Lord, you know it's just impossible
Because of you
It's all brand new
My life is now worth while
I can't imagine me without you

When I found you I was blessed
And I will never leave you
I need you

Imagine me without you
I'd be lost and so confused
I wouldn't last a day
I'd be afraid without you there to see me through
Imagine me without you
Lord, you know it's just impossible
Because of you
It's all brand new
My life is now worth while
I can't imagine me without you

I can't imagine me without you

周杰伦 - 安静 MV

2008-08-25T05:44:00.000+08:00

只剩下鋼琴陪我談了一天
睡著的大提琴
安靜的舊舊的
我想你已表現的非常明白
我懂我也知道
你沒有捨不得
你說你也會難過我不相信
牽著你陪著我也只是曾經
希望他是真的比我還要愛你
我才會逼自己離開

Chorus
你要我說多難堪
我根本不想分開
為什麼還要我用微笑來帶過
我沒有這種天份
包容你也接受他
不用擔心的太多
我會一直好好過
你已經遠遠離開
我也會慢慢走開
為什麼我連分開都遷就著你
我真的沒有天份
安靜的沒這麼快
我會學著放棄你
是因為我太愛你

Repeat

The Game of Love

2008-08-13T06:09:00.000+08:00

© By W.T.

What we thought was love and happiness?
Is now gone all that's left is to move on.
Say goodbye and walk away.
Take your wounded pride put it aside.
The game of love you have lost.
Your broken heart is the cost.
Count your blessings and pray.
maybe You will win at the game of love one day.
Just learn when to walk away.
Your strong enough to say good bye.
Don't hold back it's okay to cry
love hurts sometimes

Stand By Me - Shayne Ward

2008-08-04T06:28:00.001+08:00

Nothing's impossible
Nothing's unreachable
When I am weary
You make me stronger
This love is beautiful
So unforgettable
I feel no winter cold
When we're together
When we're together

[ chorus ]
Will you stand by me
Hold on and never let me go
Will you stand by me
With you I know I belong
When the story gets told

When day turns into night
I look into your eyes
I see my future now
All the world and its wonder

This love wont fade away
And through the hardest days
I'll never question about us
You are the reason
My only reason

Will you stand by me
Hold on and never let me go
Will you stand by me
With you I know I belong
When the story gets told

I am blessed
To find what I need
In a world losing hope
You're my only believe
You make things right
Everytime after time

Will you stand by me
Oh darling and never let me go
Will you stand...stand by me
will I'm be part of your life
When the story gets told

[ repeat chorus ]

Stand by me
No my darling say I want
you by my side
Say I need you here with me
Stand by me

Remember

2008-07-21T04:26:00.001+08:00

remember being patience is a virtue..

hmmm..

2008-07-18T06:35:00.002+08:00

still couldn't sleep even after texting her good night.. just need to blog how i'm really feeling right now.. it's really very confusing for me right now.. the feelings i'm having be it good or bad is taking a toll on me.. working like hell.. even on my off days i'm doing work too.. feeling so so tired.. wanted so much to take a break maybe go for a weekend getaway.. but time is not on my side.. no matter how i try to multitask my stuff/work still not enough time.. damn how i wish i was younger where sleeping 2-3 hours is more than enough for me.. damn age is taking a big hindrance of what i'm trying to do/achieve..

as for my love life.. it's really confusing too.. i shouldn't say much cos she does read my blog every now and then.. so i shall cut it short that i'm neither here nor there.. suspend/hanging nowhere..

went for karaoke with mich and in today.. sang my lungs out and from now onwards i'm taking hot/warm drinks only occasionally cold drinks esp my favorite coke zero! hehehe wad a BIG sacrifice i'm gonna do.. :P

sigh.. am feeling better by bit after blogging as usual.. so let's stop here and head the sack.. having a long day later.. cannot be late for appointment later in the afternoon.. then work later at night.. another vicious cycle!! URGHHHHHH...